' rhifl JDBt is from a epeech of Cniame against Domitiua. Tbe gt«» Doniitia. n family nf great nobility, bad produoed many patridaai xumtriEBblB, as well for ether vices, as for vuiity. EUatdL ' Thi«e wcrd^ iire from some play now lost ^Bafi2 DE 03WT0BE; OR, ticular eipression or thought: but aa, in the former kind, both in turratioD. and imitation, aU resemblance to the plajem of pantoimme ehould be avoided, so, in this, all Bcurriloua buffoonery is to be studioualy shunned by thft' orator. How, then, shall we distinguish from Craaaus, & '" Catulus, and from others, jour acquaintance Graniua, or friend Vargulat Ko proper distinction really occurs to me; for they are both witty; no man has more of verbal wit- tieiam than Granius. The first point to be observed, how- ever, is, I think, that we ahould not fancy ourselves obliged to utter a jest whenever onB may be uttered. A very little witness was produced. Mot/ I question him? says Pbilippus. The judge who preBided,^ being in a hurry, replied. Yes, if he is short. You shall have no fault to find, said Philippua, for I shall question him very short. This was ridiculoua enough; but Lucius Aurifbz was aitting as judge in the cause, who was sborter than the witness himself; so that all the laughter was turned upon the judge, and hence the joke appeared scurrilous. Those good things, therefore, which hit those whom you do not mean to hit, however witty they are, are yet in their nature acurrilous; as when Appius, who would be thought witty, — and indeed is so, but sometimes slides into this fault "of aourrihtyj — said to Caius Sestios, an acquaintance of mine, who is blind of aa eye, / will sup vrUk you to-night, for I see that there is a vacancy for one. This was a acurrilous joke, both because he attacked Sextiua without provocation, and said what was equally applicable to all one-eyed persons. Such jokes, as they are thought premeditated, excite less laughter; but the reply of Sextiua was eicelleat and extempore; Woih your Imnds^^ said he, , and come to supper. A regard, therefore, to proper times, ■ moderation and forbearance in jesting, and a hmitation in the number of jokes, will diatinguish the orator from the buffoon; and the cireumatance, besides, that we joke with an object, not that we may appear to be jesters, but that we may gain some advantage, while they joke all day without any ' Quaiitor. The mBgistrate who preeided at a qmcatia capiCitlit, whether ths prajtor or any other. Sea Cie. Verr. L 10; Vatiu. 1*; Sail Jug. 40. HeaTklaea.
' Whether the jol:e was directed n^inat h'm as being unalean, or aa ■ ' ig diBhonest, is uaoartftin, EUcitdl, ( THE CHABACTEn OP THE ORATOII.
purpose whatever. For what did Vargula gain by Baying, when AuluB Semprunius, then a candidate for office, aud his brother llarcus, saluted him, Boy, drive away tkejliea? His aim was to raise a laugh, which is, in my opinion, a very poor effect of wit. The proper seaaoa, then, for jesting, we muat determine by our own pi'adonoe and judgment; in the exer- cise of which I wish that we had some body of rules to direct ub; but nature is the sovereign guide.
LXI. " Let us now consider briefly the sorts of jesta that chiefly excite laughter. Let this, then, be oui firat division, that whatever is eipresaed wittily, conaiBte sometimes ia a thought, sometimes in the mere language, but that men are most delighted with a joke when the laugh ia raised by the thought aud the language in conjunction. But remember this, that whatever topics I shall touch npon, from which ridicvde may he drawn, froiQ ahuoEt the same topics Eeriotis thoughts luay be derived: there is only this difference, that seriousness is used on dignified subjecta with gravity, joking on Buch as are in some degi-ee unbecoming, and as it were ^ grotesque; for instance, we may with the very same words commend a thrifty servant, and jest upon one that is ex- travagant That old saying of Nero ^ about a thieving servant is humorous enough, That he was the only one from whom, nothing in the liouse tixM iealed or locked up; a thing which is not only said of a good servant, hut in the very same words. From the same sources spring all kinds of sayings. What his mother said to Spuriua Carvilius, who halted griev- ously from a wound received in the public service, and wna on that account ashamed to go out of doors, Go, my Spurius, thai as often as you take a step you nuzff be reminded of your inerils, was a noblo and serious thought; but what Olaucia said to Colvinus, when he limped. Where is the old proverb — JDoes lie elaudicate } im; but he elodicales,- ia ridiculous; and ' Probably taken tram the apophthegms of Cato, and probably, al^o, a Baying of Coiua Claudius Nero, who was cooaul with Mbtcub Liviua, A.u.a M7, and defeatea Hannibal at Sena. Liv. uvil 34. Etiendt.
' Tha original is, Nmm claudicai t at kic chdicat, " What, is ha iBmB t No; but he favonra Clodius." The reader eaaily asea that tha force of the pun, which ia bad enough at the Erst hand, ia anliraly lost bj a liUral trajialation. I have been forced to coin two Eneliah words from ths Latin to convey aome idea of it. Had Clodiua lived in this country, nnd his name been Grerille, I had teen as happy as GlavLiia", TX OIU.T0BE; OB, yet both ara derived from what may be observed with regard tu lameness. What it m^rt ir/n^ve Ikan thit 2f(Bviui f said Scipio with severity; but Philippus, with some haciMHir, to one who had a sticog smell, / perceive that I am eircuTrnvnted iy you;^ jet it is the resemblance of words, with the ohnnge only of B. tetter, that constitutes both jokes.
'' ThoBe smart sayings which spring from some ambiguity are thought extremely ingenious; but they are not always employed to espress jests, but often even grave thoughts. What Publiua Licinua Varus said to Africanus the elder, when he was endeavouring to fit a chaplet to his head at an entertainment, and it brok.e several times, So not wonder if it dan not fit you, for you have a great head, was a fine and noble thought; but He is bald enough, for he aai/s htU litcle,^ is of the aaioo sort. Not to bo tedious, there is no subject for jest from which serious and grave reflections may not bo drawn. It is also to be observed that everything which ia ridiculous is not witty; for what can be so ridiculous as a buffoon t* But it is by bis face, his appearance, hb look, his mimicry, his voice, and, in fine, by his *hole figure, that he for then I could have nid, " Wlisra is the old proverb, '^liat, U he CivtlUd! So; but he in Greaitied. R Ifua, claudical U thought StrebiEua to hare been a commoD question with regard to a man suspected of mmt of judgment or honeaty.
' Quid hoe Ncaia iffnarita t It ie thought to have been a Joke of Publios Afritnuiu Major, who, according to some, was aoeuBEd by the Petiiii, trLUuuea oE the people, or, according to othera, by a caitiun TrfiLroiis Ntevius. 5ee Liv. xxxviil 50, 56; YaL Max. iii. T » A. OelL iv. 13.' But it might have be«n aaid by A&icanUB the younger in reference to some other man. BUeitdl, ' Fides me H le cinmnieiitn. Toup, in hia Appendix to Theocritus, auraests that we ahould read Video me it te vtm circum, ttd hiFom- vtatri, referring to a similar joke of Aristophanes, Acham. 850.
" Calmu saiU at, quod dicil jiarttn. The meaning is by no meuu dear, and no change in tbe pnnctoation elucidatea it...Pearce snp- poaea that it ia said of a. bad orator: " If he were to say more, ho would give leiB BatiafactioEi; what be has said ia ao far aatiifactary, as it ia brief."...Henrichaen thinlo Chat eatna might be used metitplion' callv, as calra oratio for j^-iaia,- mA that the joke is on tJie ambiguity of the word. To me the passage seeitu ineiplicatile. Etlaidt, ^Vhethe^ calmt in the teit be a proper name or not, ia a matter of uncertainty; Tnmebu> tUnke it is not.
* Sanitio. The tmmifnii were ao called from tamia, s grimsci^ and personated ridiculous cbunctna, tike the Arkstkau or Pvkmtlli at tfat Italianii, Ellaidt.
.RiOTEa OP THE OKAIOR.
cscitea laughter. 1 might, indeed, ca!l him vjittv, but not in Huch a way that I would have an orator, but an actor iu pantomiaie, to he witty.
UCII. "This kind of jesting, above all, then,, though it powerfully excit^B laughter, is not suited to us; it lepreaents the morose, the HuperstitioUB, the auspicious, the vaiuglorions, the foolish; — habits of mind which are iu tbemselvea ridi- cnlous; and such kind of characters we are to expose, not tu assume. There is another kind of jesting which is extremely ludicrous, namely mimicry; but it is allowable only in us to attempt it cautiously, if ever we do attempt it, and but for a moment, otherwise it is far from becoming to a man of edi». OBtion. A third is distortion of features, utterly unworthy of us. A fourth is indecency in language, a di^race not only to the forum, but to aiiy company of well-bred people. So many things, then, being deducted fiwm this part of oratory, the kinds of jesting which ren^ain are (as I distinguished them, before) such as consist ia thought or in expreesion. That which, in whatever terms you express it, is still wit, consists iu the thought; that which by a change of words loses its spirit, has no wit but what depends on eipression.
" Plays oa ambiguous words are extremely ingeaious, but depend wholly on the eipreflsion, not on the matter. They seldom, however, excite much laughter, but are rather com- mended aa jests of elegance and scholarship; as that about TitiuB, whom, being a great tennis-player, and at the some time suspected of having broken the sacred Images by night, Terentiua Tospa excused, when his comptnions inquired for him, aa he did not come to the Campus Martius, by sayicg that he had bi-oken an arm. Or as that of Africanus, which ia m Luoiliua, Qvidl Stcim, mtmlam an e^nfixum vit faom! inquiL' ' This YBTBB of LuciliuB would he imintelligibla to ub, even if wo wars cErtoin that tlia rBadiag of it is sound. Heufiisger thiokJi that Lndlius referred to the gama plaved with uutB, which the author of the eleg; entitled " Nux " moatioos: Qaas pu£r auC recttu certo dila- miaat ielit. Others think that c<mjicum faare signifies merely con£- girt. Emeeti supposes tbst a sorb of dish, made of pieces of ð, fricoKe, is meant. Schutz saggeets that, if this be the meaning of eonfimim, some kind of eutable must he intended b; nvcaid. But this prints ns nothing. SUmdt.
I I Or, as your friend Granius, Craaaus, Baid of somebody. That he was not vioi-th. the sixth part of an as} And if you were to ask me, I should say that be wlia is called a jester, excels chiefly iu jokes of this kind; but that other jests excite laughter ia a greater degree. The ambiguous gaioa great admiration, as I obsei'ved before, from its nature, for it ap- pears the part of a wit to be able to turn the force of a word to quite another sense than that in which other people take it; but it excites surprise rather than laughter, unless when it happens to be joined with some other sorts of jesting.
LXIII. " Some of these sorts of jesting I will now run over: but you are aware that that is the most common kind of joke, when wo expect one thing and another ie said; in which case our own disappointed expectation makes ua laugh. But if something of the ambiguous is thrown in with it, the wit is heightened; as in Xteviua, a man seems to be moved with compassion who, seeing another, that was senteuced for debt, being led away, inquires, jFor ftow m'ueh is he adjudged t He is answered, A thousand sestertii. If he had then added only. You may take hint away, it would have been a species of joke that takes you by surprisej but as be said, I add ■no more; you may take him away, (thus introducing the ambiguous, another kind of jest,) the repartee, as it seems to me, ia rendered witty in the highest degree. Such eqoi- TOcation is most happy, when, in any dispute, a word is caught from your adversary, and thenco something eevere is turned upon the very person who gave the provocation, as hy Catulus upon Philippus.^ But as there are several sorts of ambiguity, with regard to which accurate study is necessary, we should he attentive and on the watch for words; and thus, though we may avoid frigid witticisms, (for we must be cautious that a jest be not thought fer-fetched,) we shall hit upon many acute sayings. Another kind is that which consists in a slight change in a' word, which, when produced by the alte- ration of a letter, the Greeks call Trapavofmaix, as Cato called Nobilior^ Mobilior; or as, when he had said to a certain ' JVon eist tfxtantis. A pliroBO applied either to anything wortli mora than a lextaiv, and tberefurs perhape of groat valuer or to imytluDg worth leaa tliaji a eextant, or of no value at all, Tamdiiu, Fulviua Nobilior. Goto had accusod him. of having taken C. LXIV,] OJf THE CHARACTER OF THE ORATOR. 207 pereou, Eamus diambulatam, and the other aeked, Quid opiu fait dbI Cato rejoined, Imd nerd, quid opva fuit te)'- Or that repartee of the eame Cato, If yov, are both advene and averse m your s/uimeless practices. The interpretation of a name also has wit iu it, when you assign a ridiouloua reafioa vihy a person ia so called; as I lately said of Hummius, who distributed money^ at elections, that he had found a name in. the Campus Martins as Nooptolemus found one at Troy.
LXIV. " All Buch jokes he in a single word Often too a verse is humorously introduced, either just as it is, or with some little alteration; or some part of a verse, as Statins said to Scaurus when in a violent passion: (whence some r, CiasHUB, that your law ^ on citizenship had. its rise:) ■ Hush 1 Silpnce I what is all Ihia coiBO! Havi Who neither h&ve a father nor a mother, ^ Such confidence? Away with all that pride.
the case of Ctelius, that jolce of youiSj Antonius, ^ assuredly of advantage to your cause; when, appearing as a witness, he had admitted that a great deal of money had gone from him, and as he had a son who was a man of plea- sure, you, as he was going away, said, See you the old man, touch'd for thirty minm? To the same purpose proverbs may he applied; as iu tho joke of Scipio, when Asellus waa boasting that while he had served in tho army, he had marched through all the pro- vinces, Drive an an, tfcc' Such jokeSj as they cannot, if any poets with him into bis province, and called tiirn ifobUior, to denote hia levity, which, among the Homans, who were fond of gravity and atoadi- neaa, waa a great crime. Tumebvt, See Cie. TuBC Quset. i. 2. He had also built a temple to the Muses. Cic ib. et Arch. o. 11; Brut. 0. 20; Plin. H, N. uxt. 3B. ■ Elltndt.
' This appears to ua modemB a very poor joke. No trajialation caa make it intelligible to those who do i;cit understand the original.
' Divaortia. JHttiaoret were thoae who distributed money among the tribes, in the name of the candidate!!, as bribes foe their votes. See Cic Verr. L 8; Plane. 19. EOendL ' The Lftx Licinia MiKta de civibva rtgendU, A.n.c. 05B, by which it waa provided that no oue should be accounted a utijun who was not waUy ft citizen. Cio. Off. iu, 11. EUendL 1^ ^ Tnniobns thinks that tho reference is to the Greek proverb, Et fii] 1 I DB ORATORE; OB, diaoge ia made in tlie words of them, retain the BUme grace, ara Decessarily considered aa turning, not on the matter, bat. on the mere expression.
" There ia also a kind of joke, not at all absurd, which lies in eipreHsion, when you seem to onderstaad a thing literally, and nut in its obvious metininy;; iu which kind it viaa that Tutor,"- the old mimic, an exceedingly laughable actor, ex- duaively distinguished himself. But I have nothing to do with actors; I only wished tliis kind of jesting, to be illua- trateil by some notable example. Of this kind was your answer lately, Crasaus, to one who asked you whether he thovXd ie froubUeome if he canie to you tome Hme b^ore it wa« light: and you said. You uiill not be troublesome; when he rejoined, Fom viill order yourtelf to he waked then f to which you replied, Surely I mid that you. would not be troublesome. Of the same aort was that old joke which they say that Mar- cus Scipio Halugineusis made, when be had to report from his century that Acidinus was Toted consul, and the officer cried out, Declare as to Zucvus Maulius, he said, / declare him to be a worthy man, and an excellent member of &e com- monwealth. The answer of Lucius [Borcius]^ ih'aBica to Cato the censor was humorous enough, when Cato said to bim, Are y9u truly satisfied that you have taken a wife } ^o, indeed, replied Nnsica, / am not indy »atitjiad? Such jests are insipid, or witty only when another answer is expected; i<x «ur surprise (as I before* obserred) naturally amuses luj and thus, whea we are deceived, as it were, in our espeetatin^V we laugh. ^ LXV. " Those jest^ also lie ia words, which spring from Sima pour, JfAnuvc Smr, " U joa eaopot drivo aa ox, drive an aaa," (aea Apostol. Prov. viL 63; Zenob. liL 94; ) but that proverb scama iniip- plicuble to this pssaage. Tdlaeus imd LambinuB suppoEw, with, more probability, that aomstbing like this must bo uadentoud: Agas aiellnm, cunmn nun dou&ifur. AselluB is Bgtttn meutjoaad in c 66. BUmdt.
' Nothing ia recorded of that actor ia psutommio. Ellendl.
' This psBBBge ia conrnpt, bat n ao emeadatiun of It can be trusted. It will be Bufflcient to enoloae Pond'a in brackets. Orellim.
» Ex tai amimi ttntcntid tu itcorein Aai«,' The wordB ex anina Kn- ieaiid had two BigaifioatiotiB: they whto used by the oaiiBors in putting quBstiona in tho aense of " truly, aJDcerely; " but they were used ia common conveniBtion in the senBS of " to a peraoa's Batii^tion." From Ibe ambignity of the pbisse prooeeiia the jofca.
*e.Bs.
)rical use of ^M FroDi alle- ^M Ea. nronoseil ^ C. LIVT.] OS THE CHABACTEB OF THE OBATOB, some allegorical phraseology, or from a metRphorical i some one word, or from using words ironioajlj'. FroDt a gorical phraseology: as when Euaea, in old times, proposed the lanr to fix the ages of candidates for ofitcea, ood Marcus Servilms, who opposed the law, said to him; Tell me, Marcus Finariiit Rusca, if I Ipeak againtt you, vnll you ipeaJc ill of mt at you hxue spoken of others 1 As you ehall sow, replied lie, $0 you shall reap. From tha use of a single word iu a metaphorical sense: as when the elder Scipio said to the Corinthians, wbo offered to put up a statue of him in the place where those of other comnianders were. That he did iiot }ike such comrades. From the ironical use of words; as when Craaaus spoke for Aculeo before Marcus Perperna as judge, and Lucius jKliua Lama appeared for Gratidianoa against Aculeo, and Lama, who was deformed, as you know, olftred impertinent interruptions, Crassua said, Zet us hear this beautiful youth. When a laugh followed, / could not form my ovfn Jiape, said Lamia, but I could form my underttand- iwj. Then, said Crassus, let lo hear (Ais able orator; when a greater laugh than before ensned. Such jests arc agreeable as weU in grave as in humorous speeches. For I observed, a little while ago,^ tliat the subjects for jest and for gravity are distinct; but that the same form of expression will serve for grave remarks, as for jokes. Words antithetically used' are a great ornament to language; and the same mode of using them is often also humorous; thus, when the well-known SaTius Galba carried to Lucius Scribfinias the trilnme a list of his own intimates to be appointed as judges, and Libo said, Whcft, Octlbct, will you never go out of your vani dining- room, I Yes, replied Galba, tehen you go out of other men's bed- chambers. To this kind of joke tha saj-ing of Glaucia to Metellus is not very dissimilar: you have your villa at Tibur, but your court on mount Palatine.^ liXVI, " Such kinds of jokes as lie in words I think that I have now sufficiently discussed; but suoii as relate to things ' Ferbt relata eontrarU. WLieh tlie Oreeki call irriStTa, when cm- trariis opjKmwMiir amiyaria. Cla Or. 60.
' VUlam. in- TWwle Aabei, corleM in Palalio. Otra at ehors meant B coop, pen, or moveable aheeji-fo!d. Schuta and StrebBua, therefoto, Buppose that Qlancia intended to deaigmite the conipsnioas of Mat^ud IU tufi/e, for which he had a pro on the Palatini DE ORATOIIB; OB, merous, &nd esciCe more laughter, aa I before.^ Among them is namitive, a matter of exceeding ditRcuUy; for auoh thinga are to be described and set before the eyes, as may aeem to be probable, which is the esoellei of narration, and such also as ore grotesque, which is peculiar province of the ridiculous; for an example, as shortest that I recollect, lot that serve which 1 mentioned before, the story of Crasaus about Memmius.^ To this head wc may assign the narratives given in fables. Allusions ate also drawn from history; as when Sextua Titius' said he was a Cassandra, / can name, said Antonius, mani/ of your Ajaca Oilei.* Such jests are also derived from iimUUudei, which include either companion or something of bodily 7tpresenla- tion. A comparison, aa whon Callus, that was once a witness against Pisoj said that a countless sum of money had been given to Magius'' the governor, and Scaurua tried to conftite him, by alleging the poverty of Magiua, Yov, mUlake me, Scaurta, said he, for I do not iay that Magiin has saved it, 6«( that, li^ a man gathering nuls wiihovt fiis clolhet, he hoK put i( into hii belly. Or, as wben Mtttcus Cicero'^ the eldeij the father of that excellent man our friend, aaid. That the of ourtimes were like the Syrian slaves; the more Greet: knew, the greater knaves they were. Representations also create much laughter, and these commonly bear upon some defor- mity, or bodily defect, with a comparison to something still more deformed: aa my own saying on Helvius Mancia, / wHi- now show, said I, what sort of man you are; when he claimed. Show ia, I pray yowj and I pointed with my fii _ to a Gaul represeuted upon the Cimbrian shield of Manual under the new shops'' in the fomm, with hia body distorted, his tongue lolling out, and his cheeks flabby. A general laugh ensited; for nothing was ever seen to resemble Manaia so much. Or as I said to the witness Titus Pinarius, who twisted his chin about while he was speaking, That he might * AntooiuB impudicoa hominis mores inuectsitur, ctini Cassandne obi] Ajace post HipuguatBin Trojam vim illfttani fuiaao conetet. ELltndl.
^ Of Magiua nothing ia known- EtleTidi.
' The grandfather of the orator, as is clearly shown by Comdiu in QuffiBt. Ernati.
' Stih Novii. Undflratandraiemti arpendiriii. See P. Fabr. Bd Qunatti ' ■ >. 22; DrakenboKh ad IJr. uii. 27; uliv. 17. " fore ^ tb(»^ ingee^l CVri.] ON THB 0B4BACTEB OP THE OKiTOR.
speai, if h« pleased, if he had done cracking his nut. There are jokes, too, from things being eitenuflted or exaggerated hjperbolicallj, and to astonish.; as you, Crassus, eaid in a speech to the people, that Memmiut fancied himself so great a man, that as he came into the forum, he stooped his head at the arch of Fahiui. Of which, kind is the saying also, that Scipio is reported to have uttered at Numantia when he was angry with Metellus, ihaX If his mother were to produce a fifth, ^uovld bring forth an ass.^ There is also frequently acute- ness shown, when something obscure and not commonly known ia illustrated by a slight circumBtanee, and often by a singla word; as when Publius Cornelius, a man, as was ■anspectad, of a covetous and rapacious disposition, but of great courage and an able commander, thanked Coiua rabricius for having, though he was his enemy, made him consul, especially during a dif&cult and important war. You have no veason to thank me, returned Fabrioius, if I had rather be pillaged than sold for a slave. Or, as Afrioanus said to AseUus, who objected to him that unfortunate lustration in his censorship. Bo not vionder; for he teho restored you to the rights of a cifisen, completed the Ivstraiion and sacrificed (he bull. There was a tacit suspicion, that Mummius seemed to Lave laid the state under the necessity of expiation by remov- ing the mark of ignominy from Asellus.
LXVII. " Ironical disamulation has also an agreeable eflect, when you say something different from what you think; not after the manner to which I alluded before, when you say the exact reverse of what you mean, aa Crasaus said to Lamia, but when through the whote course of a speech you are seriously jocose, your thoughts being different from your words; as our friend Sesavola said to that Septu- muleius of Anagnia, (to whom its weight in gold was paid for the head of Caius Gracchus,) when he petitioned that he would tate him as hia heutenaat^neral into Asia, What would yoa have, foolish man i there is such a multitude of bad irteenj thai, I warrant you, if you slay at Rome, you will in a few years maie a vast fortune. Fanuius, in his Annals, says that Aflicanua the younger, he that was named.^railiamia, was ' QuintuB Metdllus Mocedonicus, aa f Intitrcli relates in his treatiae A Fartmid Bomanontnt, had four aona, whose abilitiea were in propoiN.
K to their ages, the joaogeat beinj the leaat gifted. FroiM, ■» "1 DE oeatore; ok,