Lys. — They do among ingenious men, and people of faihion, though you will fometimes meet with ftrong prejudices againft them in the middle fort, an effecT; of ordinary talents and mean breeding.
Euph. — I mould wonder if men were not fhocked at notions of fuch a furprifing nature, fo contrary to all laws, education and religion.
Lys. — They would be fhocked much more, if it had not been for the fkilful addrefs of our Philofophers; who, confidering that moft men are influenced by names, rather than things, have introduced a certain polite way of fpeak- ing, which leffens much of the abhorrence and prejudice againft vice.
Euph. — Explain me this.
Lys.— Thus, in our dialect, a vicious man, is a man of [Dial. II.] MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. 63 pleafure: A fharper is one that plays the whole game: A lady is faid to have an affair: A gentleman to be gal- lant: A rogue in bufinefs, to be one that knows the world. By this means, we have no fuch things as fots, debauchees, whores or rogues, in the beau monde, who may enjoy their vices without incurring difagreeable appella- tions.
Euph. — Vice then is, it feems, a fine thing with an ug- ly name.
Lys. — Be afiured it is.
Euph. — It fhould feem then, that Plato's fearing left youth might be corrupted, by thofe fables which repre- sented the gods vicious, was an effecT: of his weakness and ignorance.
Lys. — It was, take my word for it.
Euph. — And yet Plato had kept good company, and liv- ed in a court. And Cicero, who knew the world well, had a profound efteem for him.
Cri. — I tell you, Euphranor, that Plato and Tully might, perhaps, make a figure in Athens, or Rome: But were they to revive here in our days, they would pafs but for under- bred pedants, there being at moft coffee-houfes in London f feveral able men, who could convince them they knew nothing in, what they are valued fo much for, morals and politics.
Lys. — How many long-headed men do I know, both in the court-end and the city, with five times Plato's fenfe, who care not one ftraw what notion their fohs have of God or virtue!
IV. Cri. — I can illuftrate this do&rine of Lyficles, by examples, that will make you perceive its force. Cleophon, a Minute Philofopher, took ftri<St care of his fon's educa- tion, and entered him betimes in the principles of his feci". Callicles (that was his fon's name) being a youth of parts, made a notable progrefs; infomuch that, before he became 64 MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. [Dial. II] of age, he killed his old covetous father with vexation, and foon after ruined the eftate he left behind him; or, in other words, made a prefent of it to the public, fpreading the dunghill, collected by his anceftors, over the face of the nation, and making cut of one overgrown eftate, fev- eral pretty fortunes for ingenious men, who live by the vices of die great. Tele/i/Ia, though a woman of quality and fpirit, made no figure in the world, till fhe was in- ftru£ted by her hufband in the tenets of the Minute Phi- lofophy, which he wifely thought would prevent her giv- ing any thing in charity. From that time fhe took a turn towards expenfive diverfions, particularly deep play: by which means fhe foon transferred a confiderable fhare of his fortune, to feveral acute men, fkilled in that myftery, who wanted it more, and circulate it quicker than her hufband would have done, who, in return, hath got an heir to his eftate, having never had a child before. That fame Tekfilla, who was good for nothing fo long as fhe believed her catechifm, now fhines in all public places, is a lady of gallantry and fafhion, and has by her extravagant parade in lace, and fine clothes, raifed a fpirit of expenfe in other ladies, very much to the public benefit, though it muft be owned, to the mortification of many frugal hufbands.
While Crito related thefe facls with a grave face, I could not forbear fmiling; which Lyficles obferving, fuper- ficial minds, faid he, may perhaps find fomething to ridi- cule in thefe accounts: But all, who are mafters of a juft way of thinking, muft needs fee, that thofe maxims, the benefit whereof is univerfal, and the damage only particu- lar to private perfons or families, ought to be encouraged in a wife commonwealth. For my part, faid Euph-anor^ I profefs myfelf to be rather dazzled and confounded, than convinced by your reafoning, which, as you obferved your- felf, taking in the connexion of many diftant points, requires great extent of thought to comprehend it. I muft there- fore intreat you to bear with my defects, fufFer me to take [Dial. II.] MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. 6$ to pieces what is too big to be received at once: And where I cannot keep pace with you, permit me to follow you, ftep by ftep, as fa ft as I can.
Lys. — There is reafon in what you fay. Every one cannot fuddenly take a long concatenation of argument.
V. Euph. — Your feveral arguments feem to center in this, that vice circulates money, and promotes induftry, which caufeth a people to flouriftu Is it not fo?
Lys. — It is.
Euph.— *And the reafon that vice produceth this effect, is, becaufe it caufeth an extravagant confumption, which is the moll beneficial to the manufacturers, their encour- agement confifting in a quick demand and high price.
Lys.— True.
Euph.— Hence you think, a drunkard moil beneficial to the brewer and the vintner, as caufing a quick confump- tion of liquor, inafmuch as he drinks more than other men.
Lys. — Without doubt.
Euph. — Say, Lyficks> who drinks mod, a fick man or a healthy?
Lys.— A healthy?
Euph. — And which is healthieft, a fober man or a drunkard?
Lys. — A fober man.
Euph. — A fober man therefore, in health, may drink more than a drunkard when he is fick.
Lys. — He may.
Euph. — What think you, will a man confume more meat and drink in a long life or a fhort one?
Lys. — In a long.
Euph. — A fober healthy man, therefore, in a long life, may circulate more money, by eating and drinking, than a glutton or drunkard, in a fhort one.
Lys. — What then?
Euph. — Why then, it mould feem, that he may be I 66 MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. [Dial. II.]
more beneficial to the public, even in this way of eating and drinking.
Lys.- — I fhall never own that temperance is the way to promote drinking.
Euph. — But you will own that ficknefs leflens, and death puts an end to all drinking. The fame argument will hold, for aught I can fee, with refpect to all other vices that impair men's health, and fhorten their lives. And, if we admit this, it will not be fo clear a point, that vice hath merit towards the public.
Lys. — But admitting that fome artificers, or traders, might be as well encouraged by the fober men as the vi- cious; what (hall we fay of thofe, who fubfift altogether by vice and vanity?
Euph.— If fuch there are, may they not be otherwife employed without lofs to the public? Tell me, LyJicleS) is there any thing in the nature of vice, as fuch, that renders it a public bleffing, or is it only the confumption it occa- fions?
Lys. — I have already (hewn how it benefits the nation, by the confumption of its manufactures.
Euph. — And you have granted, that a long and healthy life confumes more than a fhort and fickly one; and you will not deny, that many confume more than one. Upon the whole then, compute and fay, which is moft likely to promote the induftry of his countrymen, a virtuous marri- ed man, with a healthy numerous offspring, and who feeds and clothes the orphans in his neighborhood, or a fafhion- able rake about town. I would fain know, whether money fpent innocently, doth not circulate as well as that fpent upon vice. And if fo, whether, by your own rule, it doth not benefit the public as much?
Lys. — What I have proved, I proved plainly, and there is no need of more words about it.
Euph. — You feem to me, to have proved nothing, un- lefs you can make it out, that it is impoffible to fpend a [Dial. II.] MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. 67 fortune innocently. I fhould think the public weal of a nation confifts in the number and good condition of its inhabitants: Have you any thing to object to this?
Lys. — I think not.
Euph. — To this end which would moft conduce, the employing men in open air, and manly exercife, or in fe- dentary bufinefs within doors?
Lys.-— The former, I fuppofe.
Euph. — Should it not feem therefore, that building, gardening, and agriculture, would employ men more ufe- fully to the public, than if tailors, barbers, perfumers, diftillers, and fuch arts were multiplied.
Lys. — All this I grant; but it makes againft you. For what moves men to build and plant but vanity, and what is vanity but vice?
Euph. — But if a man mould do thofe things for his convenience or pleafure, and in proportion to his fortune, without a foolifh oflentation or overrating them beyond their due value, they would not then be the effect of vice; and how do you know but this may be the cafe?
Cri.— One thing I know, that the readieft way to quicken that fort of induftry, and employ carpenters, ma- fons, fmiths, and all fuch trades, would be to put in prac- tice the happy hint of a celebrated Minute Philofopher; who, by profound thinking, has difcovered, that burning the city of London would be no fuch bad action, as filly prejudiced people might poflibly imagine; inafmuch as it would produce a quick circulation of property, transferring it from the rich to the poor, and employing a great num- ber of artificers of all kinds. This, at leaft, cannot be deni- ed, that it hath opened a new way of thinking to our incen- diaries, of which the public hath of late begun to reap the benefit.
Euph. — I cannot fufficiently admire this ingenious thought.
6S MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. [Dial. II.]
VI. But methinks it would be dangerous to make fuch notions public.
Cri. — Dangerous! to whom?
Euph. — In the firft place, to the publifher.
Cri. — That is a miftake; for fuch notions have been publiflied and met with due applaufe, in this moft wife and happy age of free- thinking, free-fpeaking, free-writing, and free-acting.
Euph. — How! may a man then publifh and practife fuch things with impunity?
Cri. — To fpeak the truth, I am rot fo clear as to the practical part. An unlucky accident now and then befals an ingenious man. The Minute Philofopher, Magirus, being defirous to benefit the public, by circulating an eftate pof- fefTed by a near relation, who had not the heart to fpend it, foon convinced himfelf, upon thefe principles, that it would be a very worthy action to difpatch out of the way fuch a ufelefs fellow, to whom he was next heir. But for this laudable attempt, Ke had the misfortune to be hanged by an under-bred judge and jury. Could any thing be more unjuft?
Euph. — Why unjuft?
Cri. — Is it not unjuft to punifh actions, when the prin- ciples, from which they directly follow, are tolerated and applauded by the public? can any thing be more inconfift- ent, than to condemn in practice, what is approved in fpec- ulation? truth is one and the fame j it being impoffible a thing fhould be practically wrong, and fpeculatively right. Thus much is certain, Magirus was perfect mafter of all this theory, and argued moft acutely about it with a friend of mine, a little before he did the fact, for* which he died.
Lys. — The beft on't is, the world every day grows wi- fer; though it muft be owned, the writers of our feet have not yet fhaken off all refpect for human laws, whatever they may do as to divine. It feems they venture no fur- ther, than to recommend an inward principle of vice, ope- rating under an outward reftraint of human laws.
[Dial. II] MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. 6> Cri. — That writer, who confiders man only as an in- ftrument of paflion, who abfolves him from all ties of con- science and religion, and leaves him no law to refpe& or to fear, but the law of the land, is to be fure a public bene- fit. You miflake, Euphranor, if you think the Minute Philofophers idle theorilts: They are men of practical views.
Euph. — As much as I love liberty, I mould be afraid to live among fuch people: it would be, as Seneca fome- where exprefleth it, in libertate bcllis ac tyrannis f&viore.
Lys. — What do you mean by quoting Plato and Seneca? Can you imagine a free-thinker is to be influenced by the authority of fuch old-fafhioned writers?
Euph. — You, Lyficles, and your friend, have quoted to me ingenious moderns, profound fine gentlemen, with new names of authors in the Minute Philofophy, to whofe merits I am a perfect ftranger. Suffer me, in my turn, to cite fuch authorities as I know, and have pafTed for many ages upon the world.
VII. But, authority apart, what do you fay to expe- rience? My obfervation can reach as far as a private fam- ily: and fome wife men have thought, a family may be confidered as a fmall kingdom, or a kingdom as a great family. Do you admit this to be true?
Lys. — If I fay yes, you will make an inference; and if I fay no, you will demand a reafon. The bed way is, to fay nothing at all. There is, I fee, no end of anfwer- ing.
Euph. — If you give up the point you undertook to prove, there is an end at once: But if you hope to con- vince me, you mull anfwer my qucftions, and allow me the liberty to argue and infer.
Lys. — Well, fuppofe I admit that a kingdom may be confidered as a great family.
Eufii.— I (hall alk you then, whether ever you knew 70 MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. [Dial. II.]
private families thrive by thofe vices you think fo benefi- cial to the public?
Lys. — Suppofe I have not?
Euph. — Might not a man, therefore, by a parity of reafon, fufpe£t, their being of that benefit to the public?
Lys.—- Fear not, the next age will thrive and flourifh.
Euph. — Pray tell me, Lyjicks, Suppofe you faw a fruit of a new untried kind; would you recommend it to your own family to make a full meal of?
Lys. — I would not.
Euph. — Why then would you try, upon your own country, thefe maxims, which were never admitted in any other?
Lys. — The experiment mull begin fomewhere; and we are refolved our own country fhall have the honor and advantage of it# Euph. — O Lyficles! hath not Old England fubfifted for many ages without the help of your notions?
Lys. — -She has.
Euph. — And made fome figure?
Lys. — I grant it.
Euph. — Why then mould you make her run the rifk of a new experiment, when it is certain (he may do with- out it?
Lys. — But we would make her do better. We would produce a change in her, that never was feen in any nation.
Euph. — Salluft obferves, that a little before the down- fall of the Roman greatnefs, avarice (the effecl: of luxury) had erafed the good old principles of probity and juftice, had produced a contempt for religion, and made every thing venal: while ambition bred diflimulation, and cauf- ed men to unite in clubs and parties, not from honorable motives, but narrow and iriterefted views. The fame hiftorian obferves, of that ingenious free-thinker, Catiline^ that he made it his bufinefs to infinuate himfelf into the acquaintance of young men, whofe minds, unimproved [Dial. II.] MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. 7r by years and experience, were more eafily feduced. I know not how it happens, but thefe paffages have occur- red to my thoughts more than once during this converfa- tion.
Lys. — Sallujl was a fententious pedant.
Euph. — But confult any hiftorian: look into any wri- ter. See, for inftance, what Xenophon and Livy fay of Sparta and Romey and then tell me, if vice be not the like- lieft way to ruin and enflave a people.
Lys. — When a point is clear by its own evidence, I never think it worth while to confult old authors about it.
Cri. — It requires much thought and delicate obferva- tion, to go to the bottom of things. But one who hath come at truth with difficulty, can impart it with eafe. I will therefore, Euphranor., explain to you in three words (what none of your old writers ever dreamed of) the true caufe of ruin to thofe ftates. You muil know, that vice and virtue, being oppofite and contradictory princi- ples, both working at once in a Hate, will produce con- trary effects, which interline difcord mull needs tend to the diffolution and ruin of the whole. But it is the de- Ggn of our Minute Philofophers, by making men wicked upon principle, a thing unknown to the ancients, fo to weaken and deftroy the force of virtue, that its effedh (hall not be felt in the public. In which cafe, vice be- ing uncontrouled, without let or impediment of princi- ple, pure and genuine, without allay of virtue, the na- tion muft doubtlefs be very flourifhing and triumphant.
Euph. — Truly, a noble fcheme!
Cri. — And in a fair way to take effect. For our young proficients in the Minute Philofophy, having, by a rare felicity of education, no tincture of bigotry or prejudice, do far outgo the old ftanders and profeffors of the feci;; who, though men of admirable parts; yet, having had the misfortune to be imbued in their childhood withfome religious notions, could never after get entirely rid of 72 MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. [Dial. II.]
them; but dill retain fome (mail grains of confcience and fuperftition, which are a check upon the nobleft genius. In proof of this, I remember that the famous Minute Philofopher, old Demodicmy came one day from converfa- tion upon bufinefs with Timander, a young gentleman of the fame fe£t, full of aftonifhment. I am furprifed, faid he, to fee fo young, and withal fo complete a villain, and, fuch was the force of prejudice, fpoke of Timandery with abhorrence, not confidering that he was only the more egregious and profound philofopher of the two.
VIII. Euph.— Though much may be hoped from the unprejudiced education of young gentlemen, yet, it feems, we are not to expecl: a fettled and entire happinefs, before vice reigns pure and unmixed: Till then, much is to be feared from the dangerous ftruggle between vice and vir- tue, which may perchance overturn and diflblve this go- vernment, as it hath done others.
Lys. — No matter for that, if a better comes in its place. We have cleared the land of all prejudices towards go- vernment or conftitution, and made them fly like other phantafms before the light of reafon and good fenfe. Men, who think deeply, cannot fee any reafon, why power ihould not change hands,^ as well as property: or, why the fafhion of a government fhould not be changed as eafily as that of a garment. The perpetual circulating and revolving of wealth and power, no matter through what or whofe hands, is that which keeps up life and fpirit in a Hate. Thofe who are even fiighrly read in our philofophy, know that, of all prejudices, the filliefl is an attachment to forms.
Cri. — To fay no more upon fo clear a point, the over- turning a government may be juftified upon the fame prin- ciples as die burning a town, would produce parallel effe£ts, and equally contribute to the public good. In both cafes, the natural fprings of action are forcibly exerted j And in [Dial. II.] MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. 73 this general induftry, what one lofes another gets, a quick circulation of wealth and power making the fum total to flourifh.
Euph. — And do the Minute Philofophers publifti thefe things to the world?
Lys. — It mult be confefled, our writers proceed in poli- tics with greater caution, than they think neceffary, with regard to religion.
Cri. — But thofe things plainly follow from their prin- ciples, and are to be admitted for the genuine doctrine of the feci:, exprefled, perhaps, with more freedom and perfpicuity, than might be thought prudent by thofe, who would manage the public, or not offend weak breth- ren.
Euph. — And pray, is there not need of caution, a rebel, or incendiary, being characters, that many men have a prejudice againft?
Lys. — Weak people, of all ranks, have a world of ab- furd prejudices.
Euph, — But the better fort, fuch as ftatefmen and le- giflators; do you think, they have not the fame indifpo- fition towards admitting your principles?
Lys. — Perhaps they may; but the reafon is plain.
Cri. — This puts me in mind of that ingenious Philofo- pher, the gamefter, Glaucusy who ufed to fay, that ftatef- men and lawgivers may keep a ftir about right and wrong, juft and unjuft, but that, in truth, property, of every kind, had fo often patted from the right owners, by fraud and violence, that it was now to be confidered as lying on the common, and, with equal right, belonged to every one that could feize it.
Euph. — What are we to think then of laws and regu- lations, relating to right and wrong, crimes and duties?
Lys. — They ferve to bind weak minds, and keep the vulgar in awe: But no fconer doth a true genius arife, but he breaks his way to greatnefs, through all the tram- K 74 MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. [Dial. II.]
mels of duty, confidence, religion, law; to all which he fiieweth himfelf infinitely fuperior.
IX. Euph.— You are, it feems, for bringing about a thorough reformation.
Lys. — As to what is commonly called the reformation, I could never fee how, or wherein the world was the bet- ter for it. It is much the fame as popery, with this differ- ence, that it is the more prude-like and difagreeable thing of the two. A noted writer of ours makes it too great a compliment, when he computes the benefit of hooped- petticoats to be nearly equal to that of reformation. Tho- rough reformation is thorough liberty. Leave nature at full freedom to work her own way, and all will be well. This is what we aim at, and nothing fliort of this can come up to our principles. Crito, who is a zealous proteftant, hearing thefe words, could not refrain. The worft effecl: of the reformation, faid he, was the refcuing wicked men from a darknefs which kept them in awe. This, as it hath proved, was holding out light to robbers and mur- derers. Light, in itfelf, is good, and the fame light which fhews a man the folly of fuperftition, might fhew him the truth of religion, and the madnefs of atheifm. But to make ufe of light, only to fee the evils on one fide, and never to fee, but to run blindly upon the worfe extreme; tKis is to make the bed of things produce evil, in the fame fenfe that you prove the worft of things to produce good, to wit, accidentally or indirectly: And by the fame meth- od of arguing, you may prove, that even difeafes are ufe- ful: but whatever benefit feems to accrue to the public, either from difeafe of mind or body, is not their genuine offspring, and may be obtained without them. Lxficles was a little difconcerted by the affirmative air of Crito; but after a fliort paufe, replied brifkly, that to contemplate the public good was not every one's talent. True, faid EuphranoT) I queftion whether every one can frame a no- [Dial.IL] MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. 75 tion of the public good, much lefs judge of the means to promote it.
X. But you, Lyftcles, who are mailer of this fubje<ft, will be pleafed to inform me, whether the public good of a nation doth not imply the particular good of its individ- uals?
Lys. — It doth.
Euph. — And doth not the good or happinefs of a man confifl, in having both foul and body found and in good condition, enjoying thofe things, which their refpe&ive natures require, and free from thofe things which are odi- ous or hurtful to them.
Lys. — I do not deny all this to be true.
Euph. — Now it would feem worth while to confider, whether the regular decent life of a virtuous man may not as much conduce to this end, as the mad fallies of in- temperance and debauchery.
Lys. — I will acknowledge, that a nation may merely fubfift, or be kept alive, but it is impoffible it mould flour- ilh without the aid of vice. To produce a quick circula- tion of traffic and wealth in a ftate, there mull be exorbi- tant and irregular motions in the appetites and paffions.
Euph. — The more people a nation contains, and the happier thofe people are, the more that nation may be faid to flourim. I think we are agreed in this point.
Lys.— We are.
Euph. — You allow then, that riches are not an ultimate end, but mould only be confidered as the means to procure happinefs.
Lys. — I do.
Euph. — It feems, that means cannot be of ufe with- out our knowing the end, and how to apply them to it.
Lys. — It feems fo.
Euph. — Will it not follow, that in order to make a na- tion flourim, it is not fufiicient to make it wealthy, with- 16 MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. [Dial. II.]
out knowing the true £nd and happinefs of mankind, and how to apply wealth towards attaining that end? In pro- portion as thefe points are known and praclifed, I think the nation mould be likely to flourifh. But for a people; who neither know nor practife them, to gain riches, feems to me the fame advantage that it would be for a fick man to come at plenty of meat and drink, which he could not ufe but to his hurt, Lys. — This is mere fophiftry ♦, it is arguing without perfuading. Look into common life *, examine the pur- fuits of men; have a due refpect for the confent of the world •, and you will foon be convinced, that riches alone are fufficient to make a nation flourifhing and happy. Give them riches, and they will make themfelves happy, without that political invention, that trick of ftatefmen and Philofophers, called virtue.
XI. Euph. — Virtue then, in your account, is a trick of ftatefmen. Lys. — It is.
Euph. — Why then do your fagacious feci betray and divulge that trick or fecret ftate, which wife men have judged neceflary for the good government of the world I Lyficles hefitating, Crito made anfwer, that he prefumed it was becaufe their feet, being wifer than all other wife men, difdained to fee the world governed by wrong maxims, and would fet all things on a right bottom.
Euph. — Thus much is certain: If we look into all inftitutions of government, and the political writings of fuch as have heretofore paffed for wife men, we mall find a great regard for virtue.
Lys.' — You {hall find a ftrong tincture of prejudice. But, as I faid before, confult the multitude, if you would find nature and truth.
Euph. — But among country gentlemen, and farmers, and the better fort of tradefmen, is not virtue a reputable thing?
[Dial. II.] MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. 77 Lys. — You pick up authorities among men of law life and vile education.
Euph. — Perhaps we ought to pay a decent refpecl to the authority of Minute Philofophers.
Lys. — And I would fain know, whofe authority mould be more confidered, than that of thofe gentlemen, who are alone above prejudice, and think for themfelves.
Euph. — -How doth it appear, that you are the only un- prejudiced part of mankind? may not a Minute Philofo- pher, as well as another man, be prejudiced in favor of the leaders of his feci:? May not an atheiftical education prejudice towards atheifm? what Ihould hinder a man's being prejudiced againft religion, as well as for it? or can you affign any reafon, why an attachment to pleafure, in- tereft, vice or vanity, may not be fuppofed to prejudice men againft virtue?
Lys. — This is pleafant. What! Suppofe thofe very men influenced by prejudice, who are always difputing againft it, whofe conftant aim it is to detect and demolifh prejudices of all kinds! except their own, replied Crttoy for you muft pardon me, if I cannot help thinking they have fome fmall prejudice, though not in favor of virtue.
XII. I obferve, Lyftcles, that you allowed to Ettphra- tier, the greater number of happy people are in a ftate, the more that ftate may be faid to flourifti: It follows therefore, That fuch methods as multiply inhabitants are good, and fuch as dirtiinilh them are bad for the public. And one would think no body need be told, that the irrength of a ftate confifts more in the number and fort of people, than in any thing elfe. But in proportion as vice and luxury, thofe public blcflings encouraged by this Minute Philofcphy, prevail among us, fewer are difpofed to marry, too many being diverted by pleafure, difabled by difeafe, or frightened by expenfe. Nor doth vice only thin a nation, but alfo debafeth it by a pu- 78 MINUTE PHILOSOPHER. [Dial. II.]