little^ and look that they perfectly comply with the Will of their Parents. Would you have your Son obe- dient to you when past a Child; be sure then to establish the Authority of a Father as soon as he is capable of Sub- mission, and can understand in whose Power he is. If you 10 would have him stand in awe of you, imprint it in his Infancy; and as he approaches more to a Man, admit him nearer to your Familiarity; so shall you have him your obedient Subject (as is fit) whilst he is a Child, and your affectionate Friend when he is a Man. For methinks they 15 mightily misplace the Treatment due to their Children, who are indulgent and familiar when they are little, but severe to them, and keep them at a distance, when they are grown up: For Liberty and Indulgence can do no good to Chil- dren; their Want of Judgment makes them stand in need 20 of Restraint and Discipline; and on the contrary, Imperi- ousness and Severity is but an ill Way of treating Men, who have Reason of their own to guide them; unless you have a mind to make your Children, when grown up, weary of you, and secretly to say within themselves, When will you dky 25 Father i § 41. I imagine every one will judge it reasonable, that their Children, when little^ should look upon their Parents as their Lords, their absolute Governors, and as such stand in awe of them; and that when they come to 30 riper Years, they should look on them as their best, as their only sure Friends, and as such love and reverence them. The Way I have mentioned, if I mistake not, is the only one to obtain this. We must look upon our Children, when grown up, to be like our selves, with the same Passions, the 35 same Desires. We would be thought rational Creatures, and have our Freedom; we love not to be uneasy under constant Rebukes and Brow-beatings, nor can we bear severe Humours and great Distance in those we converse with. Whoever has such Treatment when he is a Man, 40 will look out other Company, other Friends, other Conver- sation, with whom he can be at Ease. If therefore a strict Hand be kept over Children from the Beginningy they will in that Age be tractable, and quietly submit to i^ as never 5 having known any other: And if, as they grow up to the Use of Reason, the Rigour of Government be, as they deserve it, gently relax'd, the Father's Brow more smoothed to them, and the Distance by Degrees abated, his former Restraints will increase their Love, when they find it was 10 only a Kindness to them, and a Care to make them capable to deserve the Favour of their Parents, and the Esteem of every Body else.
§ 42. Thus much for the settiing your Authority over your Children in general. Fear and Awe ought to give you 15 the first Power over their Minds, and Love and Friendship in riper Years to hold it: For the Time must come, when they will be past the Rod and Correction; and then, if the Love of you make them not obedient and dutiful, if the Love of Virtue and Reputation keep them not in laudable 20 Courses, I ask, what Hold will you have upon them to turn them to it? Indeed, Fear of having a scanty Portion if they displease you, may make them Slaves to yoiu: Estate, but they will be nevertheless ill and wicked in private; and that Restraint will not last always. Every Man must some 25 Time or other be trusted to himself and his own Conduct; and he that is a good, a virtuous, and able Man, must be made so within. And therefore what he is to receive from Education, what is to sway and influence his Life, must be something put into him betimes; Habits woven into the 30 very Principles of his Nature, and not a counterfeit Car- riage, and dissembled Outside, put on by Fear, only to avoid the present Anger of a Father who perhaps may ^ disinherit him.
•'T^ § 43. This being laid down in general, as the Course -35. ^^^ that ought to be taken, 'tis fit we now come to 'J^ **** '* consider the Parts of the Discipline to be us'd, a little more particularly. I have spoken so much of carry- ing a strict Hand over Children, that perhaps I shall be suspected of not considering enough, what is due to their 40 tender Age and Constitutions. But that Opinion will vanish, u when you have heard me a little farther: For I am very apt to think, that great Severity of Punishment does but very little Good, nay, great Harm in Education; and I believe it will be found that, cceteris paribus^ those Children who have been most chasHs'd, seldom make the best Men. All 5 that I have hitherto contended for, is, that whatsoever Rigor is necessary, it is more to be us'd, the younger Children are; and having by a due Application wrought its Eflfect, it is to be relax'd, and changed into a milder Sort of Govern- ment. 10 § 44. A Compliance and Suppleness of their Wills, being by a steady Hand introduced by Parents, ^^ before Children have Memories to retain the Beginnings of it, will seem natural to them, and work after- wards in them as if it were so, preventing all Occasions 01 15 struggling or repining. The only Care is, that it be begun early, and inflexibly kept to 'till Awe and Respect be grown familiar, and there appears not the least Reluctancy in the Submission, and ready Obedience of their Minds. When this Reverence is once thus established, (which it must be 20 early, or else it will cost Pains and Blows to recover it, and the more the longer it is deferred) 'tis by it, still mix'd with as much Indulgence as they make not an ill use of, and not by Beatingy Chiding^ or other servile Funtshments, they are for the future to be govem'd as they grow up to more 25 Understanding.
§ 45. That this is so, will be easily allowed, when it is but consider'd, what is to be aim'd at in an s if-demai ingenuous Education; and upon what it turns. ' "** I. He that has not a Mastery over his Inclinations, he 30 that knows not how to resist the Importunity of present Pleasure or Pain^ for the sake of what Reason tells him is fit to be done, wants the true Principle of Virtue and In- dustry, and is in danger never to be good for any Thing. This Temper therefore, so contrary to unguided Nature, is 35 to be got betimes; and this Habit, as the true Foundation of future Ability and Happiness, is to be wrought into the Mind as early as may be, even from the first Dawnings of Knowledge or Apprehension in Children, and so to be confirmed in them, by all the Care and Wa)^ imaginable, by 40 those who have the Oversight of their Education.
§ 46. 2. On the other Side, if the Mind be curb'd, jy^'g^^^ and humbled too much in Children; if their Spirits be abased and broken much, by too strict an Hand over them, they lose all their Vigour and Industry, 5 and are in a worse State than the former. For extravagant young Fellows, that have Liveliness and Spirit, come some- times to be set right, and so make able and great Men; but dejected Minds^ timorous and tame, and low SpiritSy are hardly ever to be rais'd, and very seldom attain to any 10 Thing. To avoid the Danger that is on either Hand, is the great Art; and he that has found a Way how to keep up a Child's Spirit easy, active, and free, and yet at the same time to restrain him from many Things he has a Mind to, and to draw him to Things that are uneasy to him; he, I 1 5 say, that knows how to reconcile these seeming Contradic- .^^-^^^ tions, has, in my Opinion, got the true Secret of Education.
{SffJ § 47. The usual lazy and short Way by Chastisement and the Rod, which is the only Instrument of Government jg^^. that Tutors generally know, or ever think of, is 20 the most unfit of any to be us'd in Education, because it tends to both those Mischiefs; which, as we have shewn, are the Scylla and Charybdis^ which on the one hand or the other ruin all that miscarry.
§ 48. I. This Kind of Punishment contributes not at 25 all to the Mastery of our natural Propensity to indulge cor- poral and present Pleasure, and to avoid Pain at any rate, but rather encourages it, and thereby strengthens that in us, which is the Root from whence spring all vicious Actions, and the Irregularities of Life. For what other Motive, but 30 of sensual Pleasure and Pain, does a Child act by, who drudges at his Book against his Inclination, or abstains from eating unwholesome Fruit, that he takes Pleasure in, only out of Fear of Whipping i He in this only prefers the greater corporal Pleasure^ or avoids the greater corporal 35 Fain. And what is it, to govern his Actions, and direct his Conduct by such Motives as these? What is it, I say, but to cherish that Principle in him, which it is our Business to root out and destroy? And therefore I cannot think any Correction useful to a Child, where the Shame of suflfering 40 for having done amiss, does not work more upon him than the Pain.
§ 49. 2. This Sort of Correction naturally breeds an Aversion to that which 'tis the Tutor's Business to create a Liking to. How obvious is it to observe, that Children come to hate Things which were at first acceptable to them, when they find themselves whipfd^ and chid^ and teas'd S about them? And it is not to be wonder'd at in them, when grown Men would not be able to be reconciled to any Thing by such Ways. Who is there that would not be disgusted with any innocent Recreation, in itself indifferent to him, if he should with Blows or ill Language be haled 10 to it, when he had no Mind? Or be constantly so treated, for some Circumstances in his Application to it? This is natural to be so. Offensive Circumstances ordinarily infect innocent Things which they are joined with; and the very Sight of a Cup wherein any one uses to take nauseous 15 Physick, turns his Stomach, so that nothing will relish well out of it, tho' the Cup be never so clean and well-shap*d, and of the richest Materials.
§ 50* 3- Such a Sort of slavish Discipline makes a slavish Temper, The Child submits, and dissembles Obe- 20 dience, whilst the Fear of the Rod hangs over him; but when that is removed, and by being out of Sight, he can promise himself Impunity, he gives the greater Scope to his natural Inclination; which by this Way is not at all altered, but, on the contrary, heightened and increased in him; and 25 after such restraint, breaks out usually with the more Vio- lence; or, § 51. 4. If Severity carr/d to the highest Pitch does prevail, and works a Cure upon the present unruly Dis- temper, it often brings in the room of it a worse and 30 more dangerous Disease, by breaking the Mind; and then, in the Place of a disorderly young Fellow, you have a low spirited moap'd Creature, who, however with his unnatu- ral Sobriety he may please silly People, who commend tame unactive Children, because they make no Noise, nor give 35 them any Trouble; yet at last, will probably prove as uncomfortable a Thing to his Friends, as he will be all his Life an useless Thing to himself and others.
§ 52. Beating them, and all other Sorts of slavish and corporal Punishments, are not the Discipline fit R^^uards ^° to be used in the Education of those we would 32 Harm from injudicious rewards. [§§ 52, 5.^ have wise, good, and ingenuous Men; and therefore very rarely to be apply'd, and that only in great Occasions, and Cases of Extremity. On the other Side, to flatter Children by Rewards of Things that are pleasant to them, is as care 5 fully to be avoided. He that will give to his Son Apph j* or Sugar-PlumbSy or what else of this kind he is mo; I delighted with, to make him learn his Book, does but auth' j rize his Love of Pleasure, and cocker up that dangerot \ Propensity, which he ought by all Means to subdue at | 10 stifle in him. You can never hope to teach him to masti; it, whilst you compound for the Check you gave his Incl ^\ nation in one Place, by the Satisfaction you propose to it ii another. To make a good, a wise, and a virtuous Man 'tis fit he should learn to cross his Appetite, and deny hi 15 Inclination to Riches^ Finery ^ or pleasing his Palate^ &c whenever his Reason advises the contrary, and his Dut) requires it. But when you draw him to do any Thing that is fit by the Offer of Money ^ or reward the Pains of Learn ing his Book by the Pleasure of a luscious Morsel; wher 20 you promise him a Lace- Cravat or a fine new Suit, upoi Performance of some of his little Tasks; what do you b} proposing these as Rewards, but allow them to be the gooc Things he should aim at, and thereby encourage his Long ing for *em, and accustom him to place his Happiness ii 25 them? Thus People, to prevail with Children to be indus trious about their Grammar, Dancing, or some other sucl Matter, of no great Moment to the Happiness or Usefulnest of their Lives, by misapply'd Rewards and Punishments, sacrifice their Virtue, invert the Order of their Education, 30 and teach them Luxury, Pride, or Covetousness, &c. For in this Way, flattering those wrong Inclinations which they should restrain and suppress, they lay the Foundations of those future Vices, which cannot be avoided but by curbing our Desires and accustoming them early to submit to 35 Reason.
§ 53. I say not this, that I would have Children kept firom the Conveniences or Pleasures of Life, that are not injurious to their Health or Virtue. On the contrary, I would have their Lives made as pleasant and as agreeable 40 to them as may be, in a plentiful Enjoyment of whatsoever might innocently delight them; provided it be with this 53 — 55] Rewards and Punishments.
33 ution, that they have those Enjoyments, only as the Con- uences of the State of Esteem and Acceptation they are with their Parents and Governors; but they should never ofifefd or bestow'd on them, as the Rewards of this or particular Fcrformanu^ that they shew an Aversion to, 5 to which they would not have apply'd themselves without t Temptation.
§ 54. But if you take away the Rod on one Hand, and se litde Encouragements which they are taken with, on other, how then (will you say) shall Children be governed? 10 move Hope and Fear, and there is an End of all Dis- line. I grant that Good and Evil, Reward and Punishty are the only Motives to a radonal Creature: These tlie Spur and Reins whereby all Mankind are set on brk, and guided, and therefore they are to be made use of 15 Children too. For I advise their Parents and Governors ays to carry this in their Minds, that Children are to be ted as rational Creatures.
§ 55. Rewards^ I grant, and Punishments must be pro- sed to Children, if we intend to work upon them. The 20 stake I imagine is, that those that are generally made use are ill chosen. The Pains and Pleasures of the Body are, , of ill Consequence, when made the Rewards and nishments whereby Men would prevail on their Children; , as I said before, they serve but to increase and strength- 25 those Inclinations, which 'ds our Business to subdue and ster. What Principle of Virtue do you lay in a Child, ou will redeem his Desires of one Pleasure, by the Pro- sal of another? This is but to enlarge his Appetite, and truct it to wander. If a Child cries for an unwholsome 30 dangerous Fruit, you purchase his Quiet by giving him ess hurtful Sweet-meat This perhaps may preserve his th, but spoils his Mind, and sets that farther out of er. For here you only change the Object, but flatter his Appetite^ and allow that must be satisfy'd, wherein, 35 I have shewed, lies the Root of the Mischief; and till you g him to be able to bear a Denial of that Satisfaction, Child may at present be quiet and orderly, but the ease is not cured. By this Way of proceeding, you ent and cherish in him that which is the Spring from 40 nee all the Evil flows, which will be sure on the next 34 Right management of praise and blame. [§§ 55 — 58 Occasion to break out again with more Violence, give him stronger Longings, and you more Trouble.
§ 56. The Rewards and Punishments then, whereby we Rf^tatwH. should keep Children in Order, are quite of 5 ^ another Kind, and of that Force, that when we can get them once to work, the Business, I think, is done, and the Difficulty is over. Esteem and Disgrace are, of all others, the most powerful Incentives to the Mind, when once it is brought to relish them. If you can once get into 10 Children a Love of Credit, and an Apprehension of Shane and Disgrace, you have put into 'em the true Principle, which will constantly work and incline them to the right But it will be ask'd. How shall this be done?
I confess it does not at first Appearance want some 15 Difficulty; but yet I think it worth our while to seek the Ways (and practise them when found) to attain this, which I look on as the great Secret of Education.
§ 57. Fir sty Children (earlier perhaps than we think) are very sensible of Praise and Commendation. They find 20 a Pleasure in being esteem'd and valu'd, especially by their Parents and those whom they depend on. If therefore the Father caress and commend them when they do well^ shew a cold and neglectful Countenance to them upon doing illy and this accompany'd by a like Carriage of the Mother and all 25 others that are about them, it will, in a little Time, make them sensible of the Diflference; and this, if constandy observed, I doubt not but will ot itself work more than Threats or Blows, which lose their Force when once grown common, and are of no Use when Shame does not attend 30 them; and therefore are to be forborne, and never to be us'd, but in the Case hereafter-mention'd, when it is brought to Extremity.
§ 58. But Secondly y To make the Sense of Esteem or Disgrace sink the deeper, and be of the more Weight, other 35 agreeable or disagreeable Things should constantly accompany these different States; not as particular Rewards and Punish- ments of this or that particular Action, but as necessarily belonging to, and constantly attending one, who by his Carriage has brought himself into a State of Disgrace or 40 Commendation. By which Way of treating them. Children may as much as possible be brought to conceive, that those that are commended, and in Esteem for doing well, will necessarily be belov'd and cherish'd by every Body, and have all other good Things as a Consequence of it; and on the other Side, when any one by Miscarriage falls into Dises- teem, and cares not to preserve his Credit, he will unavoid- 5 ably fall under Neglect and Contempt; and in that State> the Want of whatever might satisfy or delight him will follow. In this Way the Objects of their Desires are made assisting to Virtue, when a settled Experience from the Beginning teaches Children that the Things they delight in, belong 10 to, and are to be enjo/d by those only who are in a State of Reputation. If by these Means you can come once to shame them out of their Faults, (for besides that, I would willingly have no Punishment) and make them in Love with the Pleasure of being well thought on, you may turn them 15 as you please, and they will be in Love with all the Ways of Virtue.
§ 59. The great Difficulty here is, I imagine, from the Folly and Perverseness of Servants, who are hardly to be hindered from crossing herein the Design of the Father and 20 Mother. Children discountenanc'd by their Parents for any Fault, find usually a Refuge and Relief in the Caresses of those foolish Flatterers, who thereby undo whatever the Parents endeavour to establish. When the Father or Mother looks sowre on the Child, every Body else should put on 25 the same Coldness to him, and no body give him Counte- nance, 'till Forgiveness ask'd, and a Reformation of his Fault has set him right again, and restored him to his for- mer Credit. If this were constantly observed, I guess there would be little Need of Blows or Chiding: Their own Ease 30 and Satisfaction would quickly teach Children to court Commendation, and avoid doing that which they found every Body condemned and they were sure to suffer for, without being chid or beaten. This would teach them Modesty and Shame; and they would quickly come to have 35 a natural Abhorrence for that which they found made them slighted and neglected by every Body. But how this Incon- venience from Servants is to be remedy'd, I must leave to Parents' Care and Consideration. Only I think it of great Importance; and that they are very happy who can get 40 discreet People about their Children.
§ 60. Frequent Beating or Chiding is therefore carefully shmim ^ ^ avoided: Because this Sort of Correction never produces any Good, farther than it serves to raise Shame and Abhorrence of the Miscarriage that 5 brought it on them. And if the greatest Part of the Trouble be not the Sense that they have done amiss, and the Ap- prehension that they have drawn on themselves the just Displeasure of their best Friends, the Pain of Whipping will work but an imperfect Cure. It only patches up for 10 the present, and skins it over, but reaches not to the Bottom of the Sore; ingenuous Shame^ and the Apprehensions of Displeasure, are the only true Restraint. These alone ought to hold the Reins, and keep the Child in Order. But corporal Punishments must necessarily lose that Effect, and 15 wear out the Sense of Shame^ where they frequently re- turn. Shame in Children has the same Place that Modesty has in Women, which cannot be kept and often transgressed against. And as to the Apprehension of Displeasure in the FarentSy that will come to be very insignificant, if the Marks 20 of that Displeasure quickly cease, and a few Blows fully expiate. Parents should well consider what Faults in their Children are weighty enough to deserve the Declaration of of their Anger: But when their Displeasure is once declar'd to a Degree that carries any Punishment with it, they ought 25 not presently to lay by the Severity of their Brows, but to restore their Children to their former Grace with some Difficulty, and delay a full Reconciliation, 'till their Confor- mity and more than ordinary Merit, make good their Amendment. If this be not so order'd. Punishment will, 30 by Familiarity, become a mere Thing of Course, and lose all its Influence; offending, being chastised, and then forgiven, will be thought as natural and necessary, as Noon, Night, and Morning following one another.
§ 61. Concerning RepiUaiian^ I shall only remark this 35 Re^tatum ^^^ Thing more of it, that though it be not the e uaum. ^^^^ Pnnciplc and Measure of Virtue, (for that is the Knowledge of a Man's Duty, and the Satisfaction it is to obey his Maker, in following the Dictates of that Light God has given him, with the Hopes of Acceptation and 40 Reward) yet it is that which comes nearest to it: And being the Testimony and Applause that other People's Reason, as $§ 6 1 — 63] Praise in public, Blame in private. 37 it were by a common Consent, gives to virtuous and well- order'd Actions, it is the proper Guide and Encouragement of Children, 'till they grow able to judge for themselves, and to find what is right by their own Reason.
§ 62. This Consideration may direct Parents how to 5 manage themselves in reproving and commending their Children. The Rebukes and Chiding, which their Faults will sometimes make hardly to be avoided, should not only be in sober, grave, and unpassionate Words, but also alone and in private: But the Commendations Children deserve, they 10 should receive before others. This doubles the Reward, by spreading their Praise; but the Backwardness Parents shew in divulging their Faults, will make them set a greater Value on their Credit themselves, and teach them to be the more careful to preserve the good Opinion of others, whilst they 15 think they have it: But when being exposed to Shame, by publishing their Miscarriages, they give it up for lost, that Check upon them is taken off, and they will be the less careful to preserve others* good Thoughts of them, the more they suspect that their Reputation with them is already 20 blemish'd.
§ 63. But if a right Course be taken with Children, there will not be so much need of the Application of the common Rewards and Punishments as we imagine, and as the general Practice has established. For all their innocent 25 Folly, Playing, and childish Actions^ are to be ri.ijA^^^^„^ left perfecUy free and unrestrained^ as far as they can consist with the Respect due to those that are present; and that with the greatest Allowance. If these Faults of their Age, rather than of the Children themselves, were, as they 30 should be, left only to Time and Imitation and riper Years to cure, Children would escape a great deal of misappl/d and useless Correction, which either fails to overpower the natural Disposition of their Childhood, and so by an ineffec- tual Familiarity, makes Correction in other necessary Cases 35 of less Use; or else if it be of Force to restrain the natural Gaiety of that Age, it serves only to spoil the Temper both of Body and Mind. If the Noise and Bustle of their Play prove at any Time inconvenient, or unsuitable to the Place or Company they are in, (which can only be where their 40 Parents are) a Look or a Word from the Father or Mother, if they have established the Authority they should, will be enough either to remove or quiet them for that Time. But this gamesome Humour, which is wisely adapted by Nature to their Age and Temper, should rather be encourag'd to 5 keep up their Spirits, and improve their Strength and Health, than curb*d and restrained; and the chief Art is to make ail that they have to do, Sport and Play too.
§ 64. And here give me leave to take Notice of one ^^^^ Thing I think a Fault in the ordinary Method 10 of Education; and that is, the charging of Children's Memories, upon all Occasions, with RuUs and Precepts, which they often do not understand, and constant- ly as soon forget as given. If it be some Action you would have done, or done otherwise, whenever they forget, or do 15 it awkwardly, make them do it over and over again, 'till they are perfect; whereby you will get these two Advantages. Firsty To see whether it be an Action they can do, or is fit to be expected of them: For sometimes Children are bid to do Things which upon Trial they are found not able to do, 20 and had need be taught and exercis'd in before they are required to do them. But it is much easier for a Tutor to command than to teach. Secondly^ Another Thing got by it will be this, that by repeating the same Action 'till it be grown habitual in them, the Performance will not depend on 25 Memory or Reflection, the Concomitant of Prudence and Age, and not of Childhood, but will be natural in them. Thus bowing to a Gentleman, when he salutes him, and looking in his Face, when he speaks to him, is by constant Use as natural to a well-bred Man, as breathing; it requires 30 no Thought, no Reflection, Having this Way cured in your Child any Fault, it is cured for ever: And thus one by one you may weed them out all, and plant what Habits you please.
§ 65. I have seen Parents so heap Rules on their Child- 35 ren, that it was impossible for the poor little Ones to re- member a tenth Part of them, much less to observe them. However, they were either by Words or Blows corrected lor the Breach of those multiply*d and often very impertinent Precepts. Whence it naturally foUow'd that the Children 40 minded not what was said to them, when it was evident to them that no Attention they were capable of was sufficient to preserve them from Transgression, and the Rebukes which foUow'd it Let therefore yom* Rules to your Son be as few as possi- ble, and rather fewer than more than seem absolutely neces- sary. For if you burden him with many Rules^ one of these 5 two Things must necessarily follow; that either he must be very often punish'd, which will be of ill Consequence, by making Punishment too frequent and familiar; or else you must let the Transgressions of some of your Rules go un- punish'df whereby they will of course grow contemptible, 10 and your Authority become cheap to him. Make but few Laws, but see they be well observed when once made. Few Years require but few Laws, and as his Age increases, when one Rule is by Practice well established, you may add another.
§ 66. But pray remember, Children are not to be taught 15 by Rules which will be always slipping out of their Memo- ries. What you think necessary for them to do, settle in them by an indispensable Practice, as often as the Occasion returns; and if it be possible, make Occasions. ^^/^ This will beget Habits in them, which being * 20 once established, operate of themselves easily and naturally, without the Assistance of the Memory. But here let me give two Cautions, i. The one is, that you keep them to the Practice of what you would have grow into a Habit in them, by kind Words, and gentle Admonitions, rather as 25 minding them of what they forget, than by harsh Rebukes and Chiding, as if they were wilfully guilty. 2. Another Thing you are to take Care of, is, not to endeavour to settle too many Habits at once, lest by Variety you confound them, and so perfect none. When constant Custom has 30 made any one Thing easy and natural to 'em, and they prac- tise it without Reflection, you may then go on to another.
This Method of teaching Children by a repeated Practice, and the same Action done over and ^ over again, under the Eye and Direction of the ^^ ^' 35 Tutor, 'till they have got the Habit of doing it well, and not by relying on Rules trusted to their Memories, has so many Advantages, which Way soever we consider it, that I cannot but wonder (if ill Customs could be wonder'd at in any Thing) how it could possibly be so much neglected. I shall name 40 one more that comes now in my Way. By this Method we shall see whether what is required of him be adapted to his Capacity, and any Way suited to the Child's natural Gdnius and Constitution; for that too must be considered in a right Education. We must not hope wholly to change their 5 original Tempers, nor make the Gay pensive and grave, nor the Melancholy sportive, without spoiling them. God has stamped certain Characters upon Men's Minds, which like their Shapes, may perhaps be a little mended, but can hardly be totally altered and transformed into the contrary.
10 He therefore that is about Children should well study their Natures and Aptitudes, and see by often Trials what Turn they easily take, and what becomes them; observe what their native Stock is, how it may be improved, and what it is fit for: He should consider what they want, whether 15 they be capable of having it wrought into them by Industry, and incorporated there by Practice; and whether it be worth while to endeavour it For in many Cases, all that we can do, or should aim at, is, to make the best of what Nature has given, to prevent the Vices and Faults to which such 20 a Constitution is most inclined, and give it all the Advantages ^ it is capable of. Every one's natural Genius should be ' carry'd as far as it could; but to attempt the putting another upon him, will be but Labour in vain; and what is so plaister^d on, will at best sit but untowardly, and have always 25 hanging to it the Ungracefulness of Constraint and Affecta- ■y' tion.
Affectation is not, I confess, an early Fault of Childhood, Afftctatian, ^"^ ^^ Product of uutaught Nature. It is of that Sort of Weeds which grow not in the 30 wild uncultivated Waste, but in Garden-Plots, under the negligent Hand or unskilful Care of a Gardener. Manage- ment and Instruction, and some Sense of the Necessity of Breeding, are requisite to make any one capable of Affec- iatioriy which endeavours to correct natural Defects, and has 35 always the laudable Aim of Pleasing, though it always misses it; and the more it labours to put on Gracefulness, the farther it is from it For this Reason, it is the more care- fully to be watch'd, because it is the proper Fault of Edu- cation; a perverted Educatipn indeed, but such as young 40 People often fall into, either by their own Mistake, or the ill Conduct of those about them.
§ 66] What is Affectation? 41 He that will examine wherein that Gracefulness lies, which always pleases, will find it arises from that natura l Coherence which appears between the Thing done and such a Temper of Mind as ca n not but be approved of as suitable to the Occasio n. We cannot but be pleas'd with 5 an humane, friendly, civil Temper, wherever we meet with it. A Mind free, and Master of itself and all its Actions, not low and narrow, not haughty and insolent, not blemish'd with any great Defect, is what every one is taken with. The Actions which naturally flow from such a well-form'd Mind, 10 please us also, as the genuine Marks of it; and being as it were natural Emanations from the Spirit and Disposition within, cannot but be easy and unconstrained. This seems to me to be that Beauty which shines through some Men's Actions, sets off all that they do, and takes all they come 15 near; when by a constant Practice, they have fashioned their Carriage, and made all those little Expressions of Civility and Respect, which Nature or Custom has established in Conversation, so easy to themselves, that they seem not artificial or studied, but naturally to follow from a Sweetness 20 of Mind and a well-tum*d Disposition.
On the other Side, Affectation is an awkward and forc'd Imitation of what should be genuine and easy, wanting the Beauty that accompanies what is natural; because there is always a Disagreement between the outward Action, and 25 the Mind within, one of these two Wa)rs: i. Either when a Man would outwardly put on a Disposition of Mind, which then he really has not, but endeavours by a forc'd Carriage to make shew of; yet so, that the Constraint he is under discovers itself: And thus Men affect sometimes to 30 appear sad, merry, or kind, when in truth they are not so.
2. The other is, when they do not endeavour to make shew of Dispositions of Mind, which they have not, but to express those they have by a Carriage not suited to them: And such in Conversation are all constrained Motions, 35 Actions, Words, or Looks, which, though designed to shew either their Respect or Civility to the Company, or their Satisfaction and Easiness in it, are not yet natural nor genu- ine Marks of the one or the other, but rather of some Defect or Mistake within. Imitation of others, without 40 discerning what is graceful in them, or what is peculiar to their Characters, often makes a great Part of this. But Affectation of all Kinds, whencesoever it proceeds, is always offensive; because we naturally hate whatever is counterfeit, i and condemn those who have nothing better to recommend,| 5 themselves by.