The whole day was passed in such thoughts, and at last when the evening light was dissolving into dusk Gora took down a shawl and, throwing it over his shoulders, went out into the street, saying to himself: “ I will claim what is mine. Otherwise I shall pass my life uselessly in this world.”
There was not the least doubt in Gora’s mind that in this whole world Sucharita was waiting for his summons, and he determined that that very evening he would make that summons final and complete.
ixxn GORA As Gora passed through the crowded Calcutta streets it seemed as if he was untouched by anything or by anybody for his mind was so intent on one object that it had passed beyond the limits of his body and was far away.
When he arrived in front of Suchanta s house.Gora suddenly regained consciousness. He had never before found the door of the house closed, but to-day it was not only closed, but when he gave it a push he found it was locked also. or a moment he stood in hesitation, then he began to knock two or three times loudly, until a servant came out, and seeing Gora in the dim light of evening^ said without being aslccd.
“ The young lady is not at homo."
“ Where is she? ” inquired Gora.
He was told that sho had gone somewhere, two or three days back, to help in the preparations for Lolita s wedding.
For a moment Gora almost decided that lie would go to attond the marriage ceremony, and as he was hesitating an unknown Babu came from inside the bouse and asked him. “ What is it, sir? what do you want? ”...,,, “ Nothing, thank you,” replied Gora, after having looked him up and down from head to feet.
“ Come in, won’t you, and sit down a little, and have a smoke l. ” urged ICailash..,.
Kailash was finding life very dull for want of companions!.!.), and if lie could only get some one to come in to have a talk with him he would feel much relieved During tho daytime he managed to pass his time somehow by going, hookah in hand, to the° ciul of the lane and watching the passers-by m the mam thoroughfare, but when evening came and he had to retire to the house he nearly died of boredom. He had finished all the subjects which he bad for discussion with Hanmohini, tor her topics of conversation were very limited m scope, bo Kailash had placed a bed in the little room beside the front door, and taking his hookah he would now and then sit there discoursing with the servant, to pass the time.
“ No, thank you, I can’t stay now, answered Gora, an.l before Kailash’s' further request was out of his mouth he was on the other side of the lane.
Gora had a firm conviction m his mind that the majority of events in his life were not accidental, and that they were not merely the result of his own individual wishes. He believed that he had taken birth for the fulfilment of some special purpose of the Ruler of his country’s destiny.
Therefore even the most trifling circumstances of his own GORA CHAP.
life had for him a special significance, and to-day when in the very face of such a strong desire on his own part he found th© door of Sucharita’s house closed against him, and when h© heard that Sucharita was not in the house, then he was firmly convinced that there was an inner meaning in this hindrance to his hopes. He who was directing his steps had made known to Gora His disapproval in this way. It was clear that in this life that door was closed, and Sucharita was not meant for him. For a man like Gora it would not do to be deluded by his own desires— he must be indifferent to joy or sorrow. II© was a Brahmin of India, it was for him to worship the divine Being on behalf of India, and his work was that of religious austerities. Desire and attachment were not for him, and Gora said to himself: “God has revealed to me plainly enough the form of attachment, and has shown me that it is not pure, and that in it there is no peace. Like wine it is red and pungent— it doe3 not allow the mind to be tranquil, it makes on© thing appear another — I am a sannyasi, in my realisation and worship it can have no place.”
CHAPTER LXXIII CHAPTER LXXIII Sucharita, after having endured the tyranny of Harimohini for so long, felt a relief during these few days with Anandamoyi such as she had never experienced before. Anandamoyi drew her so naturally to herself that it was difficult for Sucharita to believe that she had ever been unknown to her or distant from her. She seemed somehow or other to understand every¬ thing that was in her mind, and even without speaking could make her feel ouito at peace. Never before had Sucharita uttered the word “ Mother ” so whole-heartedly, and she used to invent all sorts of pretexts for calling out “'Mother ” even when there was not the least need for it. When, after all the arrangements for Lolita's wedding were completed, and she was lying tired out on her bed, she could think only one thought, and that was how could she now leave Anandamoyi, and she began to repeat to herself, “ Mother! Mother! Mother! ” and as she spoke her heart became so full that the tears began to flow, and the next moment she saw that Anandamoyi herself was standing beside her bed.
“ Did you call for me? ” asked Anandamoyi, stroking her head.
LXXIII GORA When Sucharita realised that she had called aloud, “ Mother! Mother! ” she was unable to answer the question, and, burying her face in Anandaraoyi’s lap, began to sob while Anandamoyi, without speaking, tried to soothe her. That night Anaudamoyi slept with her.
Anandaraoyi did not like to leave as soon as Binoy’s wedding was over, so she said: “ These two are novices — how can I go before I get their domestic arrangements to run smoothly?
“ Then, mother, I will stay on with you for these few days,” observed Sucharita.
“ Yes, mother, let Suchi Didi stay on with us a few days, joined in Lolita eagerly.
Satish, on hearing of this proposal, came in dancing with joy, and, throwing his arms round Suchnrita’s neck, exclaimed: “ Yes, Didi, I too will stay.”
“ But you have your lessons, Mr. Chatterbox,” objected Sucharita.
“ But Binoy Babu can teach me! ” protested Satish.
“Binoy can’t take on your tutoring now,” observed Sucharita.
“ Of course I can! ” shouted Binoy from the next room. " How could I in one day become so preoccupied ao to forget all that I have learnt through sitting up night after night at my studies? ” “ Will your aunt give her consent? ” asked Anandamoyi.
“ I will send a letter to her,” answered Sucharita.
“ No, don’t you write, I will write,’’ suggested Anandamoyi.
Anandamoyi realised that if Sucharita herself expressed her wish to stay on Harimohini would feel hurt, but if sho made the request then the anger would be directed against her and not against Sucharita.
In her letter Anandamoyi informed Harimohini that, in order to get the domestic arrangements straight in the new home, she would have to remain for a few days, and if she would consent to Sucharita staying on with her it would be a great help.
When Harimohini received this letter she felt not only angry but suspicious. She thought that now that she had put a stop to Gora’s visits to her house, the mother was spreading a skilful net with which to snare Sucharita, and she saw clearly enough that this was a conspiracy between the son and his mother. She remembered now that she had taken a dislike to Anandamoyi from the first, when she had seen what her tendencies were.
GORa CHAP.
GORa CHAP.
If only she could get Sucharita safely married into the famous Roy family she would feel relieved of a great burden. How much longer could a man like Kailash, or any one else for that matter, be kept waiting like this? The poor fellow was blackening the walls of the house with his smoking day and night without ceasing...The morning after she had received the letter Harimohmi took a servaut and a palanquin and sot out for Binoy’s house, arriving there to find Sucharita, Lolita and Anandamoyi making preparations for cooking in the room on the ground floor. From the upper storey the sound of Satish’s shrill voice repeating English words, with their spelling ami Bengali synonyms, startled the whole neighbourhood. _ When lie was at home the sound of his voice was not so evident, but here, in order to give clear proof that his lessons were not being neglected, he paid particular attention to making his voice unnecessarily loud..., Anandamoyi welcomed Harimohmi with great warmth, but without paying any attention to tlic politeness with winch she was received Harimohini began without any preamble: “ I have come to fetch Radharam.”.
« Very well, but sit down for a little, won’t you? ’ invited Anandamoyi.,...
"No, thank you, answered Harimohmi, all my puja has to be performed yet, I haven’t even finished my morning prayers— I must go back home at once.”
Sucharita was employed in cutting up a pumpkin, and did not say a word until Harimohini, addccssiug her directly, said: “ Don’t you hear mo? It’s getting late.”
Lolita and Anandamoyi remained silent, and Sucharita, putting aside her work, got up and said: " Come, auntie,” and on her way towards the palanquin she took her aunt’s hand and, drawing her into another room, said in a firm voice: “ Since you have come to fetch me I will not turn you away iu front of everybody, — I am goin^ home with you, but I shall come back here to-day at noon.
" Just listen to her! ” exclaimed Harimohini in vexation. “ Then why don’t you say that you will stay on here for good? ” “ I can't stay on here for good! ” answered Sucharita. “ That is why I will not leave her so long as I have the oppor¬ tunity of being with her.”
This remark infuriated Harimohini, but as she did not feel it was an opportune moment for replying she said nothing.
Well, mother, I'm just going home for an hour or two.
T.xxiii GOKA 3S1 J’ll be coming 'back soon,” said Sucharita smiling to Ananda- anovi.
“ Very well, my dear,” replied Anandamoyi without asking •any questions.
“ 1 will be back at noon,” whispered Sucharita to Lolita.
“ Satish 'i ” asked Sucharita, with an inquiring look, as she was standing in front of the palanquin.
“ No, let Satish stay where he is,” said Harimohini, feeling that Satish was a disturbing influence in the house and was ■better at a distance.
When they were both safely inside the palanquin Ilariino- Jiini tried to introduce the subject of her discourse. She said: •“ Well, there’s Lolita married ofE! That’s a good thing. Parcsh Babu need not worry any more about one of his ■daughters.” And with these words as an introduction she ■dilated on the immense burden that an unmarried daughter was in a home, and showed what a cause of intolerable anxiety :she was to her guardians.
“ What can I say to you? I have no other cause for worry. Even when I am repeating the name of God this thought keeps •coming to my mind. Really and truly, I tell you that I can’t ,give my mind to the service of God as I used to. I say: Oh, *God! you have taken everything else from me, why now are you fashioning this new noose to entangle me? ” It appeared then that this was a cause not only of worldly ■anxiety on the part of Harimohini, but it was an impediment in the path of her salvation. And yet on hearing of such a % ■serious difficulty Sucharita remained silent! Harimohini was tunable to understand exactly what Sucharita’s idea was, but an accordance with the proverb that “ silence gives consent,” .•she interpreted her attitude as favourable to her own point of •view, and thought that her victim’s mind was yielding a little.
Harimohini now went on to hint how easily she had accom¬ plished the very difficult task of opening the doors of Hindu tsocictv to a girl like Sucharita, and how she had managed so well that even when invited to the homes of big men such as ICulin Brahmins, Sucharita would be able to sit in one line with the rest of the guests at their feasts without any one •daring so much as to whisper an objection.
When the discourse had reached this point the palanquin arrived at the house. When they were about to go upstairs Sucharita noticed that in the little room by the front door the servant was rubbing oil on the body of some unknown gentle¬ man, preparatory to his bath. This guest did not display the GORA CnAI*;.
least shyness on seeing Sucharita — in fact he looked at her with intense curiosity.
On going upstairs Harimohini explained that her brother- in-law had come on a visit, and in view of what had gone before. Sucharita guessed at once how the land lay. Harimohini/ tried to explain to her that in view of their having a visitor in. the house it would be most impolite for her to leave again, at midday, but Sucharita shook her head violently, and. exclaimed: “ No, auntie, I must go.”
“ Very well then,” said Harimohini, “ stay hero to-day, and go to-morrow.”
“ When I have taken my bath I shall go and take my meat with father, and I will go to Lolita’s from there,” persisted Sucharita.
“ But he has come to see you,” blurted out Harimohini at; last.
“ What is the use of his seeing me? ” inquired Sucharita blushing.
“ Just listen to her! ” exclaimed Harimohini. “ In these- days all this business cannot be managed without seeing! In my young days it was different. Why, your undo never saw me until the first auspicious look in the marriage ceremony.”' And having given this broad hint she hastily went on to give- further details of the preliminaries to her own wedding. She- explained how, when the proposal for her own marriage wa» first brought up, two old and tried retainers from the famous , Roy family came to her father’s house, together with two- servants in big turbans and with staffs in their hands, to see¬ the girl. She described how excited her guardians were andi what preparations were made in her homo for the proper reception and feasting of these representatives from tho Roy family. With a long sigh she ended up by saying: “ In these days everything is different.”
“You won’t have to bother yourself much,” urged Hari¬ mohini, “ only see him for five minutes, that’s all.”
“ No! ” said Sucharita emphatically.
Harimohini was rather taken aback by the emphasis and; decision which was expressed in this “ No! ” and said: “ Very- well, it will be all right even if you don’t show yourself. There is no need for you to see each other — still ICailash is a modem young man, well educated— like you he has no respect for anything, and he said that he would see the bride with his own, eves. And as you appear in public before everybody I said there would be no difficulty in the way, and I would arrange lxxiii GORA 383 *or you to meet one day. But if you feel shy, then vt-hat does it matter if he doesn’t see you? ”.
She then began to discourse on his wonderful education, how with one stroke of his pen he had got the village Post¬ master into trouble, and how, whenever anybody in any of the neighbouring villages became involved in litigation, or had a petition to draw up, they would not move a single step without first consulting with Kail ash. As for his character and nature it was almost unnecessary to speak. He had not wanted to marry again after his first wife’s death, and in spite of the repeated requests of his friends and relatives had pre¬ ferred to obey the commands of his gurus. Harimohini had had to tako no end of trouble to get him to hear of tho present proposal. Ho you think he wanted to listeu? Such a high- class family too! And held in such gre,at respect by society!
Sucharita however had not the least wish to be a cause of lowering that respect; she was not selfishly looking to her own glory, "in fact, if it so happened that the Hindu community could find no place for her, she made it quite clear that she would not be in the least upset. This foolish girl was quite unable to realise that to have got Kailash’s consent to tbis marriage after so much effort was a matter of no small honour for Sucharita— on the contrary she seemed to count it as an insult. Harimohini was perfectly disgusted at all this con¬ trariness of modern times.
Then in her resentment she began to make all sorts of insinuations about Gora. She asked what position he had in society in spite of all lus boasts about his being such a good Hindu. Who had any respect for him she would like to know? And who had the influence to protect him from the penalties which his community would inflict upon him if, out of covetous¬ ness, he married some moneyed girl of the Brahrao Samaj? Why, all their money would have to be spent in bribing his friends to keep their mouths shut 1 And so on.
“ Why are you talking like that, auntie? ” expostulated Sucharita. “ You know quite well that there is no foundation for what you are saying r’ “ When one has reached my time of life,” sneered Hari¬ mohini, “ it is beyond any one’s power to mislead me. I keep my eyes and ears open. 1 see, hear, and understand everything and only keep silent from amazement.”
She then expressed her firm conviction that Gora was plotting with his mother to marry Sucharita, and that the main object of this wedding was not a noble one. And she GORA CHAP.
added that if she herself were not able to save Sucharita by the oiler from the Roy family then in time Gora’s conspiracy would be successful.
This was too much for even the forbearance o t Suchanta, and she exclaimed: “ Those of whom you arc speaking are people whom I respect, and since it is impossible for you to comprehend in the least the nature of my relationship with them, there is only one course for me to follow— I must go away from here— when you are reasonable again and I can come and live with you alone, I will come back again.
“ If you have no inclination for Gourmohan,” urged Hari- mohini, “ and if you arc not going to marry him, then what fault have you to find with this husband? You are not going to remain unmarried? ”.
“ Why not? ” cried Suchanta. I am not ever going to maHarimohini opened her eyes wide in astonishment, and exclaimed: “ And will you, till you are old, remain -? ’ “ Yes, till death! ” said Sucharita.
CHAPTER LXXIV Sccharita’s absence from home when he had been so anxious to see her caused Gora’s mind to undergo a change.. He felt that the reason why Sucharita had obtained such an influence over him was that he had been mixing too intimately with them all, and without ‘himself being aware of it he had got entangled. In his pride he had overstepped the limits which had been prescribed, and by neglecting prohibitions had violated the customs of his country. It was not merely that if each one did not keep within the proper limits people did harm to themselves, whether knowingly or unknowingly, but they also lost their unmixed power of doing good to others. By association and intercourse with people many kinds of feelings become so strong that they obscure the power of our faith and our wisdom.
It was not only that by becoming intimate with the girls of a Brahmo family Gora had discovered this truth, for even where he had been mixing with ordinary people he was begin¬ ning to feel that he had lost himself in a whirlpool. For at every step a feeling of pity had been born in him which made him constantly think that such and such a thing was evil, and GORA LXX1V such a thing was wrong and ought to be got rid of. But had not this feeling of compassion merely distorted his power of judging between good and bad? The more inclined we are to regard things with pity the more completely do we lose our power of seeing truth as a whole and unchanging— we ooscure what should be light by our compassion, as smoke obscures ^‘“Therefore,” said Gora to himself, “ it has always been the rule in our country for those who have to bear the burden of the wclfaro of all to remain aloof. The idea that a king can protect his subjects by mixing intimately with them is entirely without foundation. The kind of wisdom that is needed by a raia in his relationship with his subjects is defiled by associa¬ tion with them. It is for this reason that the subjects surround their king of their own free will with a halo of aloofness, for they realise that if their king becomes their companion then the reason for his existence disappears.”.
The Brahmin too should preserve this aloofness, this detach¬ ment. The Brahmin who allows himself to get entangled with the common people and sprawl in the mud of trade, who in his greed for money tics round his neck the noose of the Sudra and dies on the gallows, was so despised by Gora that he hardly counted him as endowed with life— he regarded such a man as inferior to the Sudras, for they at least were true to their own caste, but such a one was dead to a sense of his own Bmhminhood, and was therefore impure. It was because of such Brahmins that India was now passing through a period of such defilement.,.
Gora was ready to-day to devote himself to the realisation of the life-giving mantram of the Brahmins. He said to him¬ self that he must keep absolutely uncontfammated^ I do not stand on the same level as others, he said. For me friendship is not necessary, and I do not belong to that common class of people for whom the companionship of woman is a sweet to be enjoyed, and for me too close a relationship with the vulgar crowd is a thing to be completely shunned. Just as the earth looks up to the sky in expectation of ram, so do they look up to the Brahmins— if I come too close to them, who will be able to give them life? ”..
-Previous to this time Gora had never given his mind much to worship of the gods, but now that he was so distressed he was quite unable to control himself; his work seemed empty to him, and his life to be half drowned with tears, and so he began to try what worship would do. He would sit motionless GORA CHAP.
in front of the idol and try to concentrate his mind entirely on it, but he could not manage to arouse in himself the lease sign of real devotion. He could explain his god by his reason, but without some sort of rhetorical figure for comparison he could not grasp the idea. But rhetorical figures do not fill the heart with devotion, and worship cannot be performed by metaphysical exposition. Gora indeed found that it was when he was launched on the current of argument with some one, rather than when trying to perform puja in the temple, that his mind was full of joy and moved with the spirit of devotion. Still Gora did not give up — every day he went through the prescribed puja, and performed the rites regulated by Scripture. He explained to his own mind that where the power of uniting with all by one’s feelings was absent, it was at least left for one to unite through custom and rules. Whenever he went into any village he would enter the village temple and, sitting in meditation, would say to himself that that was his proper place— on one side the god and on the other side the worshipper, and between them, acting as a sort of bridge, the Brahmin uniting them together. Gradually it dawned on Gora that the feeling of devotion was not necessary for a Brahmin.
Devotion was a particular quality of the common people, and the bridge which united the devotee with his faith was a bridge of knowledge, and just as this united both together so also it placed a limit between the two. If there were no gulf of undiluted wisdom between the devotee and his deity then everything would be distorted. Therefore the confusion caped by devotion was not a thing to be enjoyed by Brahmins —it was for them to sit apart bn the pinnacles of wisdom, and by their austerities, preserve the mystery of the faith pure and undefiled for the enjoyment of the common crowds..Tust as in the world there can be no rest for Brahmins, so in the worship of the gods there is for them no room for the enjoyment of devotion. This is the Brahmin’s glory. In the world, restraint and obedience to rules was for Brahmins, and in their practice of religion, knowledge. Because his heart had obtained a victory over him, Gora had prescribed to his rebellious heart the punishment of banishment. But who would take the culprit into banishment? Where would the soldier be found to perform that duty?
C.XXV GORA SS7 CHAPTER LXXV The preparations for Gora’s penance ceremony were going •on apace in the garden by the side of the Ganges. Abinash felt considerable regret that the place chosen for it was so far •away from the centre of Calcutta that it would not attract much attention. He knew that Gora himself had no real need for making penance — the need was his country’s, the people ■of which needed it for moral effect. So ho felt it was necessary do hold the ceremony in the midst of a crowd.
But Gora would not consent, for the great sacrificial firo .and the chanting of Vcdic mantrams which he wanted, the eniddlo of a crowded city such as Calcutta was unsuitable. For that a hermitage in the forest would have beeu more ifitting. On the lonely bank of tho Ganges, to the accompani¬ ment of Vedic chants and lighted by the ilamcs of the sacrificial £rc, Gora would invoke ancient India, the teacher of the whole •world, and bathing and purifying himself he would take his initiation from her into his new life. Gora cared nothing for *“ moral effect.’'
Finding no other way of satisfying this desire for publicity, Abinash took refuge in the Press, and, without telling Gora anything, he sent news of the coming ceremony to all the news¬ papers. Not only so — he wrote several long leading articles an which he made it Jcnown that so spirited and pure a Brahmin .as Gora could not bo contaminated by any sin, but ho had •taken upon his own shoulders all the faults of present-day fallen India and was going to perform penance on behalf of the whole country. He wrote: “ Just as our country is .suffering from tho fetters of a foreign raco as a result of its own wickedness, so Gourmohan Babu also has experienced in his •own life the sorrow of prison shackles. So, as he was bearing :in himself the sorrow of his country, and was prepared to Jractice penance himself for his country’s evil conduct, so rothcr Bengalis, unhappy millions of India’s children, you .also should,” etc. etc.
When Gora read all these effusions he was furiously angry, but Abinash was irrepressible. Even when Gora abused him ;he was unmoved — in fact he was rather pleased. He felt that his guru roamed in a higher realm of thought than others and did not understand all these worldly matters. It was the heavenly Narod who charmed Vishnu with the strains of his wina and made him create the holy Ganges, but to make it 388 GORA chap.
flow through the world of mortals was the task of the worldly King Bhagiratha— it was not a work for those who dwelt in- heaven. These two tasks were absolutely distinct; so whom Gora became furious at Abinash’s outrages, Abinash merely- smiled to himself, and his reverence for Gora grew still greater than before. He said to himself: “ As our guru’s face is like- that of Shiva so in his thoughts he is just like Bholanath. He- understands nothing, he has no common sense, he gets angry at the least trifle, but it only takes a moment for him to become- pacified.”
As a result of Abinash’s efforts this affair of Gora s penance- ceremony began to cause a great sensation all around, and the number of people who came to Cora’s house to see him or to- be introduced to him was phenomenal. Every day so many letters came for him from all over the country that he at last- gave up reading them. In Gora’s opinion all this public dis¬ cussion of his penance destroyed the solemnity of the occasion. — for it made it merely a kind of social function. This was a. common fault of the times.
Krishnadayal never touched the newspapers nowadays, but the rumour of all these proceedings penetrated even into hia retreat, and his attendant satellites dilated with great pride- on their hopes that this worthy son of their revered friend, would one day occupy a place equal to that of his holy father. He was already following in his footsteps, and they told the- news of the approaching ceremony with great gusto, telling; him with what 6clat it was to be celebrated.
It is difficult to say how long ago it was since Krishnadayal* had set foot in Gora’s room. But to-day, putting aside his. silk garments, he dressed in ordinary clothes and actually entered. But Gora was not to be seen there, and the servant, informed him that he was in the household temple.
“ Heavens! What need has he in the temple? ” exclaimed. Krishnadayal.
When he was informed that he was at worship he was still’ more alarmed, and went straight off to the door of the temple. There he saw that Gora was actually at his puja, and he called, out to him from outside: “ Gora! ” Gora stood up in surprise on seeing his father.
Krishnadayal had established in his own part of the house- the worship of his own particular tutelary deity. The family were Vaishnabs, but he had become a shakta, and had not- joined in the family worship for a lone time. He now called to Gora: “ Come, Gora, come out of there! ” LXXV GORA “ What does all this mean? ” exclaimed Krishnadayal when Gora had come out. “.What business have you m “ There are Brahmins for doing puja,” complained Krish- nadayal when Gora made no answer. “ They perform all the “ There’s nothing wrong in it, is there f inquired ^ora.
“ Wrong indeed! ” exclaimed Krishnadayal. “ What do- you mean? It is altogether wrong! What is the need for those who have not the right to do these things to meddle- with them? It is a crime, I tell you! It is a crime not for you alone, but for the whole family! ” _